15 Things You Need To Do For A Relationship To Last
A relationship is something that we all want in our lives since the connection with the loved one is essential for happiness. “You know when you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because the reality is finally better than your dreams.” — Dr. Seuss.
Is there anything in the world more inspiring, more moving and touching than love itself? We’ve all been in relationships and we’ve all been in love, at least one time in our lives. Do you remember these times, when you awake and the day is already shiny and beautiful simply because you are in the arms of the person you love?
Or that morning coffee when you just smile at each other and laugh over little things and you have the feeling that you can do anything, that you can conquer the whole world because that person loves you from the bottom of his/her heart?
There are so much beautiful things that love can give us and it is the most important thing in the relationship, but in order for a relationship to work and to last a long time there are a few details that we must pay our attention to.
For love to flourish and not be destroyed in hard times (and we all have hard times somewhere during our lifetime) there are certain guidelines that can be helpful.
1.BE OPEN AND HONEST TO EACH OTHER
Every relationship should be based on honesty and trust. These two things are absolutely crucial for a relationship to work.
This is the silent promise that you will be given a hand when you fall, that your feelings will be appreciated no matter the circumstances and that the person that you love is also your best friend, a companion for the good and for the bad times. It is a belief that you will be told the truth no matter what the problem is.
2.BE BEST FRIENDS TO ONE ANOTHER
Always make sure that you want only good for one another. Relationships should lie on true friendship and on true help and carrying between two persons. When you have a sincere support from the one you love, you become a better version of yourself. That is a solid foundation from all the great achievements to start.
None of us is infallible. You will do mistakes along the way, so will your partner. But, it is comforting to know that someone will love you so much that he will forgive you. That doesn’t mean that you should keep repeating the same mistake, but the notion that you are loved in such a way that you are worthy to be forgiven.
It is also good to remember that once you forgave your loved one a mistake, you shouldn’t bring it up every time over and over again.
4.RESPECT AND NURTURE YOUR FRIENDSHIPS
You were social human beings before you met, right? And you had a lot of friends that you used to hang out with before you had your relationship with that special one?
It is perfectly normal to see your friends a little less now when you are in a relationship, but you have to keep your social life active. As you were separate personalities before you fell in love, with your interests and friends, you have to keep on developing yourself even in a relationship. In that way, you will not suffocate the love you feel for one another, because each one will feel free and loved at the same time.
And after all, if a relationship ends, the friends will be the ones who will embrace you and weep your tears off.
5.DO NOT COMPARE YOUR PARTNER WITH YOUR EX
There is no worse thing to do in a relationship than openly comparing the person you love with your ex. That would certainly hurt his/her feelings deeply since every one of us wants to be loved for themselves. If you have this negative habit, your partner will certainly feel in one point of time as ‘not enough’ woman or man and may even become alienated from you.
The best thing to do is remind yourself that your ex-became an ex for a reason!
6.DO NOT EXPECT YOUR PARTNER TO FULFILL ALL YOUR DREAMS
Before you enter any relationship you should be satisfied with who you are and in a way be self-sufficient. Although love can be an inspiring flame that moves you forward it is not a magic thing that suddenly will transform your life into something great. You may realize that you will have the same questions of looking for your own purpose in life and the meaning of life itself.
Your partner cannot and should not be a person to fulfill your gaps.
7.DO NOT CRITICIZE ALL THE TIME
Instead of criticizing, it is so much better to be supportive! Of course, there will be times when you will have to be critical to someone’s actions, but most of the times, you can watch how supportiveness can change a person and how often is enough just to believe in someone in order for him or her to thrive in something and become a better person.
8.DO NOT TRY TO FIX THE PERSON YOU LOVE
We all have flaws; we are just human beings after all. There is a common mistake that many people do- trying to change their partners and to fix their flaws.
That usually ends up with two disappointed people, one that didn’t succeed in changing the other and the other feeling of not being good enough. At the start of the relationship, there is only one question to be asked: “Is this a person who I can accept fully with all his/her flaws and still be satisfied in the relationship?”
People rarely change and expecting someone to change just because he/she is in a relationship with us is silly. Some things can be changed, but the personality traits and parts of the person’s character are unlikely to be changed.
A long lasting relationship, especially marriage, demands a lot of compromises. Many people view compromise as something bad, giving up of one’s position, but it is absolutely necessary for a relationship to work. It is after all a team of two people, not one, so compromising is simply a way for two people reaching mutually satisfying solution.
10.GET OUT OF ROUTINE EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE
We all tend to do some things in a repetitive manner after some time. And repetition can be a devastating point for a relationship, especially a long one. Boredom can become a serious issue in almost every relationship so it is necessary to escape routine whenever you have the chance to do so. You can go on a trip together, go out to visit places where you haven’t been together…
11.REMIND THE OTHER PERSON THAT YOU LOVE HIM/HER
People usually take love for granted and after a while they stop telling each other how special they are and that they still love each other. It does so much good for a relationship to tell the other person that you love him/her.
There will be hard times in life when you will be sad and negative for a reason, but it is extremely important not to hold grudges against life for a long time. It is easy to slip into a negative mood and become depressed, but that eventually leads for another person to feel as bad as you. In the long term, your relationship becomes a place of sorrow and grief instead of a safe harbor that provides joy and happiness.
13.BE GRATEFUL FOR THE RELATIONSHIP THAT YOU HAVE
Remind yourself once in a while that you have something amazing in your life that shouldn’t be taken for granted. Think of all the good things that your relationship gave you over the span of time and just be happy because you have it.
14.WORK ON YOUR PROBLEMS TOGETHER
Every couple has its own issues and problems and it is perfectly normal. Finding the way with your partner through this can be a challenging task. It is really important to talk about them and to really hear what the other side has to say. The communication is an essential part of any good relationship.
15.DO NICE THINGS FOR ONE ANOTHER
Small details really make a difference! It doesn’t need to be expensive gifts or something spectacular, but small details of affection and carrying. There are so many ways to say ‘I love you’ to the person you care about. Sometimes, the words are not even necessary. The kiss is all that takes!
Keep your loved ones close and enjoy every moment because love is a gift of life and a true meaning and purpose of being on this beautiful Earth- to love and be loved in return.